Chicago Bears

“Everything, is on the Table.”: Utter nonsense from the Bears press conference

“Stop. Collaborate and Listen.” Rob Van Winkle, er…..”Vanilla Ice” was on to something on his way to being a one hit wonder. He was the first person I ever heard use the word “collaborate” when I was like 10.

However, he didn’t use it 497 times in one goddamn Zoom Press Conference like circus that is the Bears totem pole of administration used in their 2021 press conference on Wednesday. Soft language and diffusing blatant topics was their way to gloss over and drag everyone’s attention away from the fact they are apparently satisfied with being a .500 franchise.

Chicago talk radio had an absolute field day with the entire 87 minute garbage fest, and rightfully so because that press conference was more awkward than my Boomer parents trying to fit in, anywhere. Chicago’s collective eyeballs rolled so far back in their heads, that the Undertaker is going to sue all of us for stealing his wrestling gimmick.

Everybody has two cents

Here are some other takeaways, because we sure as shit didn’t see many on the field this year:

-George McCaskey literally said that he asks his own competition/other owners what he should do when it comes to football matters. Even if it is only sometimes, that is sometimes too many.

-Also, according to George Halas freakin’ grandson, Pace and Nagy are still learning six and three years onto the job respectively.

**I get the continuity aspect in sports, where people get better the more they do a job, or are supposed get better at it. Pace has improved, but it’s hard to discern with these two, though.  Pace has just enough to hang around, and I feel like it’s the same with Nagy. They are both riding that “Coach of the Year”/”Executive of the Year”  wave, but that sucker is crashing into the shoe next year.

-Everyone involved in the conference justified a mediocre franchise by saying how well they hold hands and “collaborate” together. Great. 16-16 past two years. Keep holding hands guys.

**Bernstein from 670 The Score hated this portion of the interview so much that afterwards, he went off on it, basically saying: “Great! You kept that culture going during a 6 game losing streak! You aren’t supposed to have 6 game losing streaks! You guys are WHY there was a 6 game losing streak!”

*Pace and Nagy didn’t reveal their contracts, but you know if a 7-9 season hits, they are both toast. I expect bigger things from them, because they know the firing line is coming.

Remember Phil Emery and Marc Trestman? how quickly we forget.

As always: Tweedledee, and tweedledumbass

Of course you don’t remember, because any sane Bears fan is collectively blocking that 2012-2014 shit show from their brains. Frankly, it’s because of these two “outside the box” hires, is why Nagy and Pace get to lurk around for another year, if not for much longer.

Emery/Trestman were bad, and believe me folks, many people will tell you, they very bad. Emery had some weirder off kilter drafts than Pace, especially when it came to small school guys. Marc Trestman was just socially aloof, awkward, and the locker room had with him after about a month. Sometimes outside the box, should stay in the box.

The clock ticks down to zero

  1. I’m not banging the drum for Nagy, but I will say, I feel like he is a hindrance to the talent on the roster, and that is not a good thing. Coaches are there to enhance talent, not pull it down. Objectively from afar, Dolphins coach Brian Flores is doing more with less in Miami, and has really whipped them into shape. It’s not taking a 12-4 team and pulling it to 8-8.
  2. As much as we want to bash these NFL and good college coaches from out little computers, these guys have insane depths of knowledge on concepts, tags, anything you name it. Have you seen an NFL playbook? You have no idea how much these dudes in the NFL know like an encyclopedia, and maybe, that is their hindrance.

**Because now that we have the magical “Twitter universe”, and NFL All-22 access for the right price of 60 bucks a year, even regular coaches can parse through a few things and “Armchair quarterback” the shit out of NFL and college coaches.

I have learned so damn much in four years from articles on the internet, and videos, clinics, etc. that the general coaching public isn’t in the dark like they have been up until this decade. Nagy feels like he’s the smartest dude in the room. Maybe he isn’t.

**This Twitter chap from England has coaching experience and dissects the shit out of Bears games. I can decode his offensive descriptions, and this seems legit.

Most GM’s are the same

Look, most GM’s are usually shooting blanks. Pace is tremendous at the middle and back end of a draft, and brutal at the top where it matters. Most GMs last about 4-5 years, and unless they hit a magic draft like the Seahawks 2013 defensive back bonanza or the Saints with their ungodly 2017 lottery ticket, they kind of shuffle along. Pace is mediocre, and the Bears could surely use some fresh eyes. I bet there are better candidates, and maybe some worse ones.

The 2020 draft saved Pace’s ass. Yes, Mooney will be pretty good, but he is one of a dozen ROOKIE receivers who had good seasons. The Bears need two more of them. Mustipher and Bars look like solid keepers, but the Bears need Daniels to be a Pro Bowler, and to find an elite tackle. Everything reeks of .500 all the time with this program. Pace and Nagy have a year left. Pace might not leave the cupboard bare like Emery, but right now, it’s got more canned vegetables, than it does amazing giant bags of Sour Patch kids.